Reflective Writing: I Hate Assessment

Option 2:
You are the Head of the IMF (International Monetary Fund). What would your 3 major policies be for:
1) Africa
2) Asia
3) Europe

The above is one of two options for a Take Home Independent Study project I have to do for my Global Social Economics Class. Not only is the question hopelessly vague, it is SUPREMELY uninspiring to me.

And I don’t want to do it.

There are a few reasons I don’t want to do it.

First of all, my interests are extremely shallow. I am extremely blessed to be allowed the opportunity to study and try to make the production and sale of material things an actual career cause if I hadn’t I don’t know what my position would have been. I went to George Washington University, a university that has an extremely strong reputation for International Affairs and Political Science studies, and I graduated from that institution never having taken a SINGLE class in either area (OR ironically in business management, entrepreneurship, finance, accounting or Math). Instead, I could boast of having an excellent GPA bolstered by performance in at least three dance classes, a sign language course and various Anthropology courses. My minor was Africana Studies because I like black people.

Shamefully, GW was mere steps away from the IMF and World Bank headquarters and I graduated with only a very vague idea of what these institutions did.

I didn’t even want to do an MBA. Why? Because I didn’t want to have to wear a suit to class (I am dead serious. I hate suits.) A simple Masters would have suited me fine. When I found a programme that offered two degrees, one of which was an MBA and travel opportunities within my field of interest I was like, “Well why the hell not?” As a result of this, courses that deal strictly with economics and have NOTHING to do with luxury irritate me and require herculean levels of motivation to complete. Do I admire and respect people who are extremely passionate in the areas of politics and economic reform? Absolutely. But that ain’t me.

But finally, this is not a case of mere procrastination (I’ve known about this project for maybeeee 2 months now and I am just attempting it. And it’s due Friday.) I feel resistance to this assignment physically rising up in my chest. And it’s because I don’t WANT to do it. I’m spoilt and I’m selfish and I am motivated primarily by personal desire and I don’t WANT to do it. I intensely dislike being assessed. I LOVE to learn. I love attending classes and I love discussing and interacting in the classroom. But I hate assignments, reports, interviews, essays, and QUESTIONS. Honestly, throughout most of my tertiary education I really wish I had the option to say, “Omg I know the damn material! Please leave me alone with your assignments. I KNOW IT!”

Apparently this is not how higher education works. But this has been my main challenge I think since the senior year of college when I seriously got tired of being asked to prove myself over and over.

So I wrote this in hopes that it would act as some sort of cathartic exercise and I would then be able to go ahead and spew lots of really profound recommendations for the IMF.

Orrrr maybe I’ll just take a nap.

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